Tips for dating a recovering addict

Many PIRs [people in recovery] also need help establishing healthy relationships.Some PIRs come from unhappy families in which emotional or physical abuse and addiction were common.As the Big Book explains it, a personal inventory works much like a business inventory, similar to when a store owner sorts through his or her goods to see which are salable, which are damaged, and which have to be thrown out.When PIRs do a personal inventory, they list the things--their thoughts, feelings, character traits, and behaviors--that stand in the way of recovery and those personal strengths that can help in recovery.You may meet your PIR while they are in the midst of working Steps Four through Ten and be curious about what this "amends making" is all about.I was so unfamiliar with the Twelve Steps that I didn't know enough to ask Steve about them or if he had done them.

tips for dating a recovering addict-32tips for dating a recovering addict-84tips for dating a recovering addict-52tips for dating a recovering addict-72

Ultimately, these Steps are about asking for forgiveness and forgiving others.It is obviously very important, therefore, for PIRs to identify and release their resentments in a constructive way.My friend Paul told me about helping PIRs make "resentment lists." He said at first they'll say "heck no, I don't have any resentments," until they actually start listing the people and things that make them angry.When people work Step Four, they begin to realize that in order to stay clean and sober, they need to handle all their feelings--the good, the bad, and the ugly ones--in a healthy and safe way rather than covering them up with mood-altering chemicals or addictive behaviors.Many PIRs who have numbed their feelings for so long start to actually feel again.

Leave a Reply